What are some common mistakes made by new immigrants of Canada in Toronto?

In the beginning years : My wife and I wandered around in small cities, and struggled to find our true calling until we moved to Toronto. This is our beloved city, in our view there is no substitute.

• We did not find many opportunities in small towns; it was almost impossible to survive due to lots of reasons.
• Second, moving to Alberta, at that time frame, Alberta used to be boom and bust economy, I believe it still is due to oil/gas prices fluctuations. We found there were hardly any stable jobs for our skill sets.

Not to take care of the kids:Toronto is a mega city, full of opportunities and attractions good and bad. Some parents get too busy in settling, working extremely hard and in a struggle to provide for the family. Some kids get neglected, and they wander off, sure they got into Canada, but in the end, they do not have the kids they dreamed. Some turned out to be total bums, parents in the end left with broken dreams.

• Never let your kids go to Pajama party and over night stay.
• Make a stringent rule for them to come home before dark.
• You must know their company.
• You must devote time.
• You must go to school to find out what is going on?
• Raising kids is not a part activity.
• Put your heart and soul in their up bringing.
• Enroll in evening classes, on line courses and enhance your credentials.
• Learn more and more English/French, written, verbal and improve your communication skills.
• Just concentrate and utilize your time very efficiently, CN Tower, Island, Mega Malls, Sale, everything will be here, do not worry.

Teach yourself and your kids from day one your competition are other immigrants:

Your competition is not Canadians, your competition is cut throat other immigrants, especially the Chinese, who love to cut your juggler vein in school, business and jobs ( in a good way). To beat them is almost impossible in every field. I know, because they are totally unique race on the earth, how I know, 80 percent of my neighbors are Chinese. My kids grew up with them. No race can compete with their discipline, family unit, hard work and total sacrifice of present for future. Toronto is the mother land of the Chinese. I salute to the Chinese, the most hard working people on the earth (in my view). Most of them do not give two hoots to religion and other waste of time. They are and will be my models. Their every minute is very productive and balanced.

Some come with a lot of chips on their shoulder: Some new immigrants come with a lot of chips on their shoulder, tried to raise their kids in a rigorous environment of the back home. Canada is not back home, it is the entirely different environment, where you touch the child, and you will soon find out when the police will be knocking at your door.

Some think multi million stores do not know what is missing: They venture into self-help and believe that they can get away. May be a few times, but one day you are going to get caught.

The real story: A group of married students was living in a building all from the same country. They were mature students, and all were Ph.D. students. The boys(men) go to school, and the ladies were shopping all day. Of course, there was competition, one woman found an easy way, of course, she was caught. The couple was not deported but close to it. The woman was banned from coming back to Canada for 25 years. This story is 100 percent true story because I know. I was a grad student at that time also, and thank God I did not live in the same building, and my wife was working may 2 or 3 jobs to feed the family.

Never venture into this: You will be finished in this country for ever, including deportation.

Friends, relatives, an acquaintance from the old country: Most of them are not your friends, relatives, and relationship, here everyone is of their race, try to mind your own business, and chalk out your trajectory.

Most of the parties, religious functions (this is my personal opinion and experience) this is not to offend anyone, and weddings are a total waste and money pit:

Disclaimer: This is my personal experience, it is not to offend anyone, please feel free to make your own judgement and deal with accordingly.

All are money pit one way or the other, most of them are the complete waste of time, an invitation to a wedding is, in fact, asking you to put money in the pot( please bring no gift, means put cash towards the honey moon). Every corner in Toronto has some religious establishment, and I believe all want money and more money. You make your own judgement this is my experience and observation.

There is absolutely no get rich quick scheme here: First there is no such thing if there is or was believe me, you are not on the priority list. There are lot of others privileged people who are line to take it.

All that glitters may not be gold: I have seen lot of bankruptcies, I have also seen ex bogus millionaires, their cars possessed by the bankruptcy trustees. I have seen big talkers just disappeared over night. Therefore, do not try to match their B.S. live frugal,down to earth and well within your means.

Do not fall into the trap of easy credit: Plastic cards, secure loans and buy now and pay later. Be extra careful, once you sign and use these cards. And you cannot pay on time. The meter is going to start ticking, some charge over 25 percent interest on the outstanding balance. Once they get you by short and curly, only death may be, but bankruptcy may save you.

Do not splurge on the cheap whisky/beer/and beat of drum:

• Do not go crazy and start throwing dollars on the singer/drum player, these are very hard earned dollars. Once you throw over the head of singer/musician are not going to come back.
• In the morning at work, when you go the job may have become redundant and they give you pink slip.(Means your job is done, it is called pink slip). By this time the bravado of the night under cheap whisky/beer is all gone, and you sit on the street bench and kick yourself.
• On top of it pounding headache, you wished the whole earth should part and swallow you inside.

Do not over stretch and lease two cars one for her and one for you:

• The jobs you are relying on, may not there in the tenure of the contracts.

Live frugally, save, and the ultimate goal is to buy your condo/house/town house:

Stop complaining about discrimination:

• It is everywhere in the world, the country you come from most likely has more.

Start digging another well before the first well goes dry:

• Work is very unreliable and learns to live day to day, job to job, contract to contract, temporary to temporary. Gravy trains of the past are long gone, if there are any, you are not going to get it. There are very highly qualified Canadians you are not the priority list unless you are Albert Einstein in your field, in fact I have not seen any.

My sum total:

Moving to Canada and becoming something, is life time goal, you may not see much in your life time. But you may lay down the foundation for the next generation. And if your next generation is smart, will grow into that tree, and your third generation will become true Canadian. In most cases, these stories are not overnight success stories. Some may have made good in the first cut but very rare.

My some total are my two grand kids: This is a story of long hard, journey soon it be fifty years in this beloved land. Many ups, downs, swing between hope and hopelessness, job and no job, failures and successes, stupid mistakes and good actions, total disappointments and successes, total hopelessness total darkness to bright lights.

I came to this country with total eight dollars, my wife’s parents gave her 500 dollars in travelers cheques for just in case. And that was in the early 70 s.

• All missions accomplished( Getting North American degrees), travels, foods of any kind, reaching to executive level in the corporate world finally, from day to day living, starting with hard core manual labor. Wife took five years to complete part time her education to upgrade her skill set.
• Helping parents back home.
• Raising family, two of them call Harvard University their Alma Mater (MBA) and one achieved Dean’s honor list, the other one is not far behind.